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I'm not sure if it was me or them- It didn't work out. After a lot of therapy I realized - I worked at it to show my dad- I could be good at the stuff he thought was important. After he died- I felt different. I'd been a jerk, suicidal and unhealthy the entire time I spent in that career. After- I felt freedom from the constant stress. Here's a few things I did then. I'm not sure what I feel about it now. I ruminate on that time. I JUST cleansed my LinkedIn. It's been almost 15 years. I appreciate the end. I always wanted to be an artist. Today I can say I am.